Yep, that was me today. I was counting circles on a tissue box and pleats in a curtain. You would think someone might do that because they are bored, but I was doing to keep from crying. I'm a very emotional person, to a fault. Today, I attended the funeral for Rachel's grandma and I was trying anything not to cry. I'd met Grandma Jeanne on several occasions and had even had brunch with her once, but I know she has moved on and is away from all that ailed her. It is thinking of Rachel that upsets me. I am easily upset when people I care about are hurt or are grieving. Also, it makes me reflect on my life.
So, my apologies to all that may have been offended today (spirits who could hear me counting in my head or anyone who caught me staring behind the Minister). I wasn't being disrespectful. I was just trying not to be a blubbering mess, for once. Rachel is not a cry baby and I didn't think it was appropriate for me to be one.